Single - Never Married

marital status - Single, Never Married. That's the option I have listed in my yahoo personals ad. You can check it out by going to the Yahoo personals site and searching on keyword "notanordinaryman".

Sometime, when I tell someone on a date ( or e-mail ) they look at you like "What's wrong with you?" Sometimes, they will actually come out and say "What's wrong with you?" That's a hard one to answer. Is there something wrong with me? I guess I could just easily respond back to them "You've been married twice, what's wrong with you?!" I may have actually done that once or twice. I don't want the door slammed at the get go, so, I usually tell them something like, Oh, I've been close a couple of times, but, fate intervened, or the timing was just never right, blah, blah, blah, yada, yada yada.

Recently, I've given it some thought, why am I single, never married, at 46? It may be something hereditary because two other of my 7 siblings never married. And it wasn't because we are dogs either, I come from a family of attractive, intelligent people. I guess if you throw double marriages of 3 of my sibs, then we've all had our allotted one marriage.

So, is it hereditary, or is there something inherently wrong with me? Maybe it's environment (sounds like a scientific research ) I wasn't really exposed to a happy-couple family unit in my formative years. This wasn't really anybodies fault, my dad had a very debilitating disease, so he wasn't an presence in my life. But, he was for my other two, older, unmarried sibs. So..why?

I've read that love is associated with a chemical reaction in the brain. My I'm deficient in some hormone or something. I mean, I felt infatuation several times in my life, but, I don't really go goo-goo over anybody.

Maybe, I've just never met anybody worth going head-over-heels over. I do see myself being with the One, someday. My biggest fear is, not getting in a bad, tumultuous relationship, but, to get in a relationship that turns "lifeless." I'll talk on this subject more latter. I'd love to hear you thoughts on love and marriage. I have to start packing for my trip to Branson.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------
After 6-mile run a week ago Friday, my knee got stiff and showed some swelling. So I didn't workout at all for two days and just lifted on Monday. This was hard for me because I wanted to go on a long ride that weekend. Tuesday, I did some light mountain biking, but Wednesday, I hooked up with a group of very good mountain bikers. We hit some very difficult trails at Landahal Park and it was an excellent workout for upper body, legs, and from a technical skill stanpoint.

Thursday, I did 20-minutes of eliptical which might have aggrevated my knee. I'm icing it as I write. Friday, I had a good threashold workout on the stationary, after a 5-minute warm up I tried to maintain 21.0 mph for 10-minuetes, then 5-min of easy spinning, then another 10-min hard. It wore me out. Felt good. I need to get in some good quality workouts, the Xterra Duathalon is in two-weeks.

The pictures below were from the KCK Street Fest. There will be some more in the next week or so.

Song for Michah

A lot of of concerned friends of Rod have asked for details of last Friday's tragedy. Here is a link to the local news report: link to news report

Below is a poem I wrote. It's my belief that, eventually, the memories of the boy will shine through the pain.



The Boy by the Lake

We head for the Lake, as summer descends
It will be a day filled with family and friends

The Boy runs free, to laugh, and to play
The sun shines down, on this glorious day

He takes off his shoes and socks
To play in the in the cool waters, among the rocks

The surface of the water, shines and glistens
The Lake whispers, and the Boy gets closer and listens

But below the surface, it’s dark and deep
The Boy slips into the arms of Eternal Sleep

The rescuers lay the boy at my feet
Hardened men, but bowed in defeat

My anguished cry pierces the sky
Please, Lord, please tell me why!

Why did you take away my joy?
Punished for the crime, of being a boy

The Somber Ceremonies are performed
And I walk the Lonely Shore once more

I gaze into the Lake, at my reflection
To see a face etched in pain upon inspection

Instead, I’m amazed to see
The face of the Boy smiling up at me.

------------------------------------------------------

Yesterday, I joined a Tiffany (see Ultra Woman, in Feb archives) and her regular Wednesday night mountain bike group. They meet at the Smythville trails at 6:30. Most of them are very good riders and some of them are championship level riders. The trails there are very good and the group ride mentality takes over and they ride it very hard. The larger group breaks up into several, smaller groups of riders of a similar level. It's good practice for the mountain bike race. I don't know the trails I don't take the lead, but follow closly on the rider in front of me. It's a rocky and winding trail, but, you just follow the line of the guy in front of you.

My weekness right now is my upper body. As I mentioned before, mountain biking is pretty much a full-body workout. I hold my own for an hour of hard riding, but, now my arms are starting to fade. It's getting harder and harder to make the sharp turns or to position my body just right going up and down the hills. I'm getting sloppy. Finally, we reconnect with a slower group and I join them. Still, I held my own pretty good for not knowing the trail, not taking enough water or eating before the ride. Overall, it was an ass-kicking workout, and a lot of fun.

Monday, I swam for 20-minutes at lunch, then mountain biked for an hour afer work. Tuesday, I lifed weights pretty hard at lunch, and them rode 25-miles on my road bike. Wednesday, was the mountain biking above. Today, I just swam for 20-minutes.

Why?!

The first thing I do when I get to work is read my e-mails. I called in last Friday so I expected a lot of mail to sort through. One left me stunned. It was from a co-worker on my team. She said that "They had recovered the body Rod's Grandson out of the lake on Saturday". I just stared at the words in disbelief. Rod is my boss. Micha, is his 8-year old grandson that lived in Texas.

I remembered when Rod brought the boy to work as a toddler. He was so cute. I've heard Rod talk to the boy on the phone several times. He's often talked about him, how he was getting so big. He was destined to be a linebacker. My eyes filled with tears and I lay my head down on my desk. Why?!? Why do things like this have to happen to such good people.

There was a link in the e-mail to the local news that had a video clip of the incedent. The Family was on an outing at Lake Buchanon, as huge lake in Texas. He was last seen playing on a sandbar with friends. Then,... he was just gone.

He was a pretty vivacious kid, and 8-years old love to explore. I could just see him on the sandbar, maybe something in the water attracted his attention and led him to seperated from the other kids. Maybe he slipped, unnoticed into the water and there was a sudden drop off. I could picture him, calling out, struggling to keep his head above water, but, there was nobody there to hear his calls. One minute, he's just having fun, and the next, he's slipping into darkness... forever.

Rod is the greatest boss a guy could ask for. He's seen a lot in life. He has two purple hearts from Viet Nam. If I was a soldier, and he was my leader, I would follow him into the depths of hell. He's had to deal with alot in life, including health issues in his family, recently. But, how do you deal with the death of a grandchild that you cheerished? I know that if anything happened to my nephew, my world would end, I mean my world would end. Rod, my heart goes out to you.

-----------------------------------------
I rested Sunday, but today, Monday, I swam for 20-minutes at lunch, then I went to the Minor Park trails for a little over an hour of mountain biking. I found a nice little offshoot that took me up on a steep climb up the side of a hill and to some, what hard core mountain bikers call "Tasty Goodness", a section of rocky trail that will test your skills. I've come along way since that first mountain biking trip last March.

Soul Rider

I was planning on meeting a group of riders at Smythville for a ride today, but, when I got out of bed, I was feeling yesterday's work pretty hard. Yesterday's workout consisted of running around a waterpark, non-stop for 4.5 hours with my 10 year-old nephew. Yes, I'm logging that as a workout.

After doing a little yard work, I was feeling good enough to do some riding, all by myself, a sole rider. A lot of people would cringe at the thought of spending several hours of solitude on a bike. They have to fill the time with mindless chatter.

Most people spend their time on group rides. There's dozens of them around town of all different levels. Most of the people are tied to their speedometers. "What's your average speed?" I think a macho factor takes over, too. They have to show up the others in the group. I think, most of the time, they ride a little harder than they need to.

Don't get me wrong, group rides are an important part of training, and I plan to do quite a bit of it this summer. But, sometimes it does a body, and mind, good to just head out on your own. For this ride, you might even choose to take a couple of hits of whatever mellows you out and puts you into a good mood, St. John's Wort, or, whatever you preference.

It's also fun to pick a course that you've never ridden before, to do a little exploring. Also, leave the MP3 player at home too. You want get into the surroundings, listen to the different birds, the wind through the trees. There were a lot of sandpiper along the river, and their shrill squeaks would take me off to the Gulf shore.

When I parked the car at a trailhead for the Little Blue Trace trail. A scout troop was having a biking outing. What a healthy thing to do. Just get out with your kid and have fun on a bike. One of the parents got chewed out for leaving some kids a lone for awhile. "There has to be at least one adult with every child at all times." What a said state of we've reached. When I was 10, my friends and I would go off to the park on our own for hours.

I would just ride a long, and, if the road looked good, I'd head down it. Roads with names like Bundshu, Eureka, or Holke. There were a of of Ozark-like hills on my route. You'd have a nice payoff after a long steep climb of a panoramic view of lush, green valleys, and a freefall going down the other side.

Your mind really wonders on rides like these. It's important not to let your mind dwell on the problems and worries of everyday life. Instead, just let your thoughts go where they want to. I rode over a bridge and felt like I was in a cloud of swifts, darting to and fro, they'd catch a bug, and then deliver it to their brood, waiting in the mud colonies on the underside of the bridge, and then they'd dart off to catch another.

It might be a good idea to get a GPS for these types of trips. I was able use the Little Blue river as a point of reference, so I didn't get lost, but, I could see that happening. I guess worse things good happen. In the end, I rode 30, hilly, miles in a couple of hours. I felt a nice sense of tiredness when I got off the bike, so I know I did my body good, but, more importantly, I recharged my soul.

New Direction

This is another picture of me my jr. in HS, circa 1977. 29-years ago. I wish I had that hair again. I wish I had that body fat. I weighed 147-lbs then. I weighed 147-lbs when I got out of college in 1983. I'm down to 170-lbs right now. Most people consider me fairly lean. Not hardly.

Before I go any further, I'd like to point out the comment left by anonymous on my last posting. It's the most heart-felt, well-written piece of writing you'll find anywhere. She (possibly a he) should be syndicated. I'm glad I can elicit such responses. That's all I ask, all I promise I'll write from the heart, and I want you to respond in kind.

Well, the Corporate Challenge debacle is behind me. I showed up for the duathalon Sunday, new that I didn't "have it", so I just kind of jogged through it for the participation point. I did ride the bike fairly hard, for the workout.

I've been facing something for the last several months that I don't want to reliquish to. I may becoming arthritic. God, I hope not. I don't recover nearly as quickly as I used to. This week, the pain is in my knee. Before that, It was in my hips.

I didn't met my goal this year of winning a medal in the corporate Challenge. The funny thing is, if I would have competed in this week's races, three weeks ago, I think I would have won a medal. I came in 2nd in my age division in the Heritage Du and felt great. But, I didn't bounce back from that race. I took it easy for a week, but, in the next week's workouts, I just nevewr recovered that spring in my step. The funny thing is, a week from now, I'll probably be ready to kick some ass again. Such is Life.

My next, primary, long-term goal, is to post an impressive time in the KC Marthon next fall. I know that my body is not going to take the pounding of a lot of running miles. So, plan to hit the bike, hard, both road and mountain. In fact, my next key race is going to be the Xterra triathalon, July 16.

I've been running at least 5-days a week since August, 2000. Maybe I just need a little break from running. Let's go back to the hard-easy approach. You normally think of that on a day-to-day approach. Then, I brought up the fact that you need to put in one easy week for every month. Well, you can aplly that to an even bigger, macro period. It is probably a good idea to take a little Sabatical every few years. Maybe I've entered a period where I need that. One thing I've noticed about coming out of an easy period, you can usually punish your body in ways that you could never before imagine.

So, this is the plan for this summer, I plan to switch the focus to bike riding. At first, I'm going to do a high volume, low-intensity style of workouts. I'll probably do just two runs each week, the Monday 31st route of 5.6 miles, and the Wednesday morning runs to the Plaza, 9.5-miles. We are supposed to start those tomorrow. We'll see. My ultimate goal is to ride close to 200-miles a week. I'll count mountain bike miles as double, which is probably about right.

On Monday I ran the traditional Monday 31st route, a very hilly 5.6-miles during lunch. I ran it a pretty good pace, maybe 8:15 miles. Today, my knee was sore and I didn't do anything.

Below is a poem that is from a movie I watched last night. It was the last poem a man wrote before he died. there is a prise for whomever can tell me what movie it was from. It's one of my favorite movies. Hint: the movie was in black and white.

How calmly does the orange branch
Observe the sky begin to blanch
Without a cry, without a prayer,
With no betrayal of despair.

Sometime while night obscures the tree
The zenith of its life will be
Gone past forever, and from thence
A second history will commence.

A chronicle no longer gold,
A bargaining with mist and mould,
And finally the broken stem
The plummeting to earth; and then

An intercourse not well designed
For beings of a golden kind
Whose native green must arch above
The earth’s obscene, corrupting love.

And still the ripe fruit and the branch
Observe the sky begin to blanch
Without a cry, without a prayer,
With no betrayal of despair.

O Courage, could you not as well
Select a second place to dwell,
Not only in that golden tree
But in the frightened heart of me?

Music Festivals

This is one of my favorite times of the year, early June. There's a festival pretty much every weekend. This week's selection was the Gladstone Blues Fest. A very nice event. Quality music, a beautiful setting, bright moon, cool breezes, cold beverage, tasty buds, good friends,and fine young hoochies in short, tight skirts shaken it in front of the dance floor.

June has another strange effect on me. I get extremely horny. You may have noticed that I haven't written too much about my dating life lately. Well, having a girlfriend will put quite a damper on that. Don't get me wrong, I was dating a cool chick (still am, I hope), but, after a couple of months of spending every weekend with some one, and especially, this time of year, I get a real ansy. Sometimes, I just get overcome with a clostrophobic-like feelings. They usually pass after a while, and can be warded off with a scheduled "off" time. But, if I wait to long...

So, I've been hitting the personals pretty hard lately. I have a hankering for some strange. I almost hooked up with a bi-sexual woman (best lovers), but she got mad when I told her that I hadn't updated my profile in a while (3-years) and that my age was off by a few years. I did get contacted by a woman in Joplin. Now, you wouldn't think that there would be much of a future dating a woman that's over 3-hours away, but, she was fairly attractive so we e-mailed, casually.

Yesterday, at work, she said that her company was going to put a block on her home e-mail access and that she may contact me through her company e-mail. I said that if I saw that it was the case I wouldn't say anything "racy", then she came back "What do you mean by racy? " And from there it just kind of took off. I'm not usually into the chat room sex thing, but, this got pretty intence. It started off slow and subtle, but, built to the point where it was very graphic, and very hot. I could tell I was having an effect on her, and I could tell that she was having an effect on me. The fact that I was doing it from my work address added another, erotic element to it. It was like making out passionately on an elivator at work, not knowing when the door would open, or who would be on the other side to catch you. After the last responce, I didn't hear from her for a while. I think she had to go off somewhere and finish the job. I felt like lighting up a cigeratte.

The day after the 800 debacle I felt a little stiff. I pretty much did an easy spin on the stationary for about 30-minutes. Tomorrow is the race. I don't expect too much. But, with a good night's rest, who knows?

The Agony of Defeat

This was a picture of me in my glory days of high school. That's Eric Link in the pic with me of Southeast H.S, a real cool dude. He later went on to run in college, him and Willis Ware were a year ahead of me.

I pulled that pic out to kind of cheer me up. I ran the Corp. Challenge 800 tonight and totally bombed. Three weeks ago, I was feeling pretty strong. I just never recovered enough after that to get in the track work. Mr. Lactic acid reared his ugly head. My body just wasn't prepared for it. The only way to prepare for it is to experience it before the race.

This was a big showcase setting, with a lot of competitors and a lot of spectators. Plus, you have that added pressure of not letting your team down. I felt totally dejected. That's the beauty of the sport, or any sport, for that matter. Everybody experiences failure at some point. It can be quite humbling at times.

I have one last chance at a medal. The Duathalon is in two days. It all depends on how my body feels on that day. This race may actually help. It's not so long as it zaps you, and, it might have woke up a few fast-twitch muscles that I'll need cycling the hills of Shawnee Mission Park. Oh, no...

Girls on Bikes

Here's the last set of bike pics (I promise). These are some Division I riders in the criterium. Their scores combined with their teams men's scores to determine the National Title. Davidson of California took the title.

I love seeing women athletes. I wish there were more in this condition in their post-college days. Get that women? Get on your bike and ride!!!








On Friday, I did threshold intervals on the stationary bike. I warmed up 5-minutes, then I would bump up the gear and maintain a speed of 21.0 for 10-minutes. Easy spin for 5-minutes, then another 10-min at threshold. Then I jumped on a treamill to finish off the brick workout. A brick is when you do a good ride and then follow it up with a run, to got your legs ready for the transition from bike to run in the du or tri.

Yesterday, I rode for 1.5-hours of mountain biking at Landahl Park. I'm getting a lot better on the technical parts, don't fall over nearly as much. I contiplated doing a race there at noon today, but, it was raining pretty good when I woke up so that helped make my decision. Besides, I have two races this week, 800 on Thur, and duathalon on Sunday, so I want to be fresh. I've bike my way into decent shape, even though I'm carrying a few extra pounds. I may suprise my self.

Mission Accomplished

I first did a posting on Tim on Jan. 23 (see archives). He wieghed 261-lbs. on that day and he stated that his goal was to weigh 240 pounds by June 2, the day he was leaving for Hawaii for scuba diving for his 20th anniversary. He's leaving tomorrow for a two-week trip. Aloha, Tim. He weighed in at 236.5 this morning, beating his goal by 3.5 pounds!

That's 25-lbs in 4 1/2 months. Pretty impressive. To the right, is the picture I took back in January. You can really tell a big difference when you see him in person. A person doesn't lose 10% of his body weight without it being noticable. What helped him acheive his weight loss was the fact that he set very specific goals. He wrote them down, and, he went the additional step of telling people what they were, just to add a little more pressure. That's a good stratagy. You start with a long-term, measurable goal, them make a series of short-term goals to get you there. Like, lose 5-lbls this month, or, walk 20-miles this week.

I also believe that the goals should be somewhat challenging. I like to use the 50% rule. That means, that with hard work, you still have only a 50% chance of meeting the goal. If you don't quite get there, so what? You probably still get futher along than if you had set an easy goal and made it. Also, the feeling of accomplishment you get when you achieve a difficult goal is fantastic. You got that Shela? A trip to Boston is waiting for you. But have to want it.

Yesterday, I ran to the track and did 4 hard 200-meters, and ended with a hard 100-meter. I have to get my body used to the fast pace of the 800, which I race in next Thursday. The distance to and from the track was almos 4-miles. I was a little sore today from that workout, but, I felt compelled to do a 15-mile bike ride, because some bastard brought a bunch of pasties to our group at work today. I had 2 1/2 creame-filled, chocalate-covered long johns. That son of a bitch.